Ministry of Magic
PLAYED BY OOC NAME
PLAYED BY Trish
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Pawns
May 7, 2017 4:33:25 GMT
Post by Gabriel Bishop on May 7, 2017 4:33:25 GMT
This was all a game to everyone else, wasn't it? He figured it out the night before, why he was sent to arrest Remus. It was a very calculated move against the werewolf to demoralize him. Their relationship wasn't a secret and the woman had both a cruel heart and a grudge against Remus. Maybe it was because he represented the real face of lycanthropy, a mild mannered man just trying to carve out a nice, quiet life with his family. Other werewolves, downtrodden by their lot in life, could even look to the older man as an inspiration. Proof that one could still live a relatively normal, peaceful life. They could have respect and esteem, hold a prestigious job and start a family. He was something that had to be taken care of and he was a pawn in her plan. And what of Remus? Was he laughing with all his Order comrades at the stupid Auror he managed to rope in? Was he just a tool to keep a close ear to the Ministry? That didn't make sense if he thought about it, but it was the only answer he had. Gabriel didn't allow Remus to explain anything, he hardly talked to the man during the actual arrest.
He probably wouldn't allow him to explain today, Gabriel decided as he strode down the depression halls of the wizarding prison. He needed the truth but he didn't trust Remus to give it to him. He didn't trust the Ministry for it, either. Half his coworkers were locked up, his boyfriend misled him and he'd never been so desolately lonely in his life. It was wearing him down and Gabriel felt very, very tired. The man paused in front of a heavy windowless door and stood for a few moments, bracing himself for what was to come. He stalled, shuffling his feet and taking the time to pull his long blonde hair back into a messy bun.
Gabriel couldn't stall for long and with one last deep breath, he opened the door and stepped inside. The room was austere with nothing but a table, a set of two chairs and a prisoner seated in one of them. His heart lurched in his chest, no amount of preparation would soften the blow of seeing Remus sitting here. The man he knew didn't deserve to be confined to a place like Azkaban. "Remus." he greeted calmly, keeping his gaze low so he didn't have to look directly at him. The other chair scraped against the concrete as he pulled it out and the auror shrugged off his jacket and sat down. His face didn't betray him to his inner turmoil. At first he planned on just getting straight down to the set of interrogation questions but the emotionless, unbothered demeanor he projected softened for just a moment. Gabriel couldn't help it, this was just so wrong. He placed his hands flat on the table and took a deep breath before looking up to the werewolf. "How are you doing?" He would regret that question later but he had to slip back into his role of boyfriend, just for a little while. It allowed the miserable feeling to ease just a little.
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Hogwarts
Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor
Werewolf
Order of The Phoenix
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44 years old
Gryffindor Alumnus
Wandless Magic
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PLAYED BY OOC NAME
PLAYED BY Mego
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Pawns
May 8, 2017 15:16:02 GMT
Post by Remus Lupin on May 8, 2017 15:16:02 GMT
This was not the stage of life in which Remus expected to find himself in prison. He was supposed to be settled down at this point. But, this was the price he paid. Remus would never settle down, he knew that. In the back of his mind, he knew there would always be that lingering price on his head - because of who he was, and who he associated with. Consequences for his every action and breath. He didn't get to settle for anything. Never had, never will. It was freeing, in a way. Made him feel less guilty.
But it wasn't exactly much comfort, not in a place like this. Azkaban was a heavy consequence. The very air of the place made you wonder if any of it was worth it. There were no longer any dementors here, but no worry - Remus brought his own. When left to his own like this, with only his thoughts in one of the most depressing environments on Earth, Remus could blacken his own soul like the king of the damn dementors. He tried so hard to keep the darkness out, but he was wearing down very quickly. His magic was being suppressed, too, and that wasn't helping at all.
Remus was thinking about Sirius. Remus was thinking about a million things at once, really - his kids and his friends down the hall and Gabriel - but Sirius hung over it all like a ghost. Twelve years. Remus didn't know if he could make it twelve days in this place now, and Sirius had been here twelve years. With the dementors. For something Remus himself had a part in. Remus' feelings over Peter's betrayal were so endlessly complex he didn't think he'd ever properly sort them out - but, at least partially, he blamed himself. Remus could have done better, when Sirius started treating him so suspiciously. But he didn't, and the man suffered terribly for it. The situation too strongly mirrored what was happening now in Remus' life, and he couldn't bear the constant reminder of it.
Obviously, Remus wasn't doing too good. When they came for him for yet more questioning, he allowed himself to be led by the arm, shuffling down the hall and staring at the floor. He was stuck somewhere deep inside himself, not too cognizant of his surroundings. He sat on the edge of the chair they put him in and stared at his hands in his lap. In combination of everything else going on right now, the suppression of his magic made him feel a strange sort of exhaustion. His eyelids were fluttering when the interrogation room door opened again.
Damn - he really ought to have expected this by now. They had to be throwing Gabriel in his face on purpose - whether to punish Gabriel or himself, Remus didn't know. But seeing the man, in a place like this, still caught him off guard. Remus' breath caught in his throat and he blinked up at Gabriel with wide, glassy eyes. "Hi," he said. He watched Gabriel's every move, refusing to look anywhere else, drinking him up because Remus knew he would be gone too soon and he needed to remember every angle of his face, he needed to not forget. The uncertainty that rested there was so devastating Remus couldn't think about it; he didn't have the mental energy.
Once Gabriel got all settled in, Remus' attention was taken up by the man's hands on the table. Those hands that made Remus feel so safe; they even looked safe now, flat and open even if the palms were facing downward. Remus didn't even feel his own hands moving, he just suddenly found his own hovering over Gabriel's. He probably wasn't allowed to touch him. As prisoner, he wasn't allowed to touch the Auror. As Remus, he wasn't allowed to touch Gabriel. Remus dropped his hands on his side of the table, resting his index finger a hair's width away from Gabriel's.
The question Gabriel asked him was not the one Remus was expecting. Gabriel had shut down on him; Remus feared, permanently. Gabriel refused to talk or even listen the whole time he was arresting Remus. Remus thought he knew what that meant, but he couldn't admit it to himself. Not yet. Not when the tiniest of glimmers of hope - an easy question and the subtle softening of Gabriel's expressionless mask - were still there to grab at and obsess over. "Tired. A bit cold." Remus was not going to lie to Gabriel anymore. He was going to do better. "Gabriel, I...I really want to explain myself. I want to give you time, but this is killing me. I have to know that you've at least heard me."
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Ministry of Magic
PLAYED BY OOC NAME
PLAYED BY Trish
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Pawns
May 8, 2017 17:56:16 GMT
Post by Gabriel Bishop on May 8, 2017 17:56:16 GMT
Addressing him as 'Remus' was a poor decision. It came from a place of familiarity, not formality. 'Mister Lupin' didn't feel right, because he had never known the man as a 'Mister' in their relatively short relationship. They were instant friends, from the very minute that Gabriel handed off the photo of the pink haired woman.. Tonks, she wasn't a random woman with pink hair. She was Tonks and although he'd never met her, Tonks sounded like an incredible person. Had to be, to earn Remus' affection. Tonks was likely rolling over in her grave with all of her friends and her husband in Azkaban. No, it was definitely a mistake to address him as Remus, it set the tone for the whole meeting. Right off the bat it stated that he couldn't do this as an auror. It encouraged Remus to reach for him.
Gabriel watched Remus as his hands neared. He made no effort to pull his own away but he didn't do anything to promote touching either. In the end Remus decided against it much to his relief, because Gabriel wouldn't have had the willpower to resist or take back control of the situation. He was an Auror, he was better than this but he was also a man of loyalty who was struggling with the subject of that loyalty's loss of integrity. Remus' answer was the first thing from the man he could believe without a second thought in a week and it sent him reaching for his discarded jacket. As a prisoner Remus wouldn't be allowed to keep it, but he could make the man a little more comfortable for a little while. He slid the jacket wordlessly across the table without an ounce of acknowledgement. He likely would have relinquished it to any of the prisoners he was to see that day, the war heros and the reporters and the grandmothers who were locked up within Azkaban, but there wasn't a second of hesitation or thought to giving it to Remus. It was as automatic as breathing.
Gabriel quirked a brow as Remus spoke again and he withdrew his hands to cross his arms over his chest. "I gave you several chances to explain yourself." he said evenly. There was no warmth in his voice, but there was no heat either. No anger, no nothing. "You saw fit not to trust me," Not a trace of resentment, either.. Just a blank slate. "even after I put my trust in you. I took a risk for you, Remus. I've taken several risks for you since then, it's no accident that there was time to get your children out. You've spent the risks I'm willing to take for you." Gabriel's emotion had bubbled up, seeping into his voice and driving up the volume. He paused to run a hand over his face and close his eyes as he struggled to get a grip on himself. The auror looked towards the door, it would be foolish to pretend they had complete privacy and he'd already said too much. The auror looked back to Remus, his tone low and angry. "I owe you nothing, not the time or attention to hear you, and not the risk of believing you."
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Hogwarts
Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor
Werewolf
Order of The Phoenix
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44 years old
Gryffindor Alumnus
Wandless Magic
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PLAYED BY OOC NAME
PLAYED BY Mego
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Pawns
May 30, 2017 19:53:29 GMT
Post by Remus Lupin on May 30, 2017 19:53:29 GMT
It almost seemed that Gabriel was going to let Remus touch him, and that's what made Remus lose his nerve. He would lose it if he were able to touch the man, he knew that for a fact. The wall propping up Remus' dignity was thin and full of holes and needed just one little push, one touch, to bowl over and let loose everything Remus wanted to scream, to cry, to curse. He never showed that part of himself and he wasn't about to start now, not with the eyes of Azkaban on him. Manifesting into the emotional wreck he was on the inside was the perfect ammunition for the Ministry and he could not let them have that. Privately, he would come undone in front of Gabriel, because the man deserved every bit of his ugly honesty and Remus knew he couldn't hold it back forever. But not now. He rested his fingertips inches from Gabriel's own.
His new vow of honesty earned him an instant, better reward, anyway. Remus admitted to being cold and immediately Gabriel handed over his jacket, not a word or thought between them. Remus gathered it up in his arms like a hungry wolf, taking in a deep breath of Gabriel's lingering scent before wrapping himself in the jacket backwards and hugging it to himself.
His own hands were now on his sides, but even so, Gabriel removing his hands from the table to gather himself up defensively felt like the ripping off of a bandage. Remus actually winced, and the expression on his face remained contorted and painful as Gabriel responded. Remus had said the wrong thing. And Gabriel was right. There were many times since their coming together, where Remus felt the sudden impulse to tell Gabriel everything. There were also times where Gabriel explicitly asked for it - the chances he gave so freely in his trust. "I trust you, Gabriel," Remus murmured under Gabriel's voice. He didn't even want to hear his own self, but his mind was panicking now. Gabriel was here, now, and Remus had to fix this here, now.
Gabriel grew louder and Remus bit down on his lip, flinching. He dropped his gaze and his head toward his lap. "Thank you." He forced himself to look up again, his eyes shining. "Thank you for doing that." Here was another thing to grasp onto - Gabriel obviously cared about something if he cared what happened to Remus' kids - and Remus grasped fiercely. Gabriel was struggling in his grasp, losing control. Remus hated and loved it. He'd hurt this man so much already, but there would be nothing comfortable about what they would have to go through next, if he was going to get a chance at a next. Remus tried his best to hold steady Gabriel's angry gaze. "You don't, you absolutely don't. But if I talk anyway, can you even bear to listen to me? That's what I have to know. If you'll ever even look at me again, even if it's to indict me."
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